Comments on: My Complicated Experience of Trying but Not Trying to Get Pregnant

By: Brittany

Brittany — Tue, 06 Dec 2022 02:04:06 +0000

In reply to Annabeth. This made my day! I'm so happy you could relate to this. Thank you so much for reading!

By: Annabeth

Annabeth — Fri, 02 Dec 2022 17:19:52 +0000

I’ve never related to a blog post more in my life. Thank you so much for writing this!

By: Brittany

Brittany — Thu, 08 Sep 2022 17:47:33 +0000

In reply to jen. This note means everything to me! I'm so glad we can all relate to this complicated, beautiful process. We are certainly not alone!

By: jen

jen — Thu, 08 Sep 2022 13:22:15 +0000

Thank you so much for writing this. I legit feel less alone and so much more understood. It feels like everyone around me is pregnant or on kid number 4

By: Brittany Chaffee

Brittany Chaffee — Thu, 01 Sep 2022 22:06:14 +0000

In reply to Carolyn.

Carolyn,
Thank YOU so much for reading. I’m really happy it’s let you explain the feelings to your husband – I did the same with mine. It’s such a weird, personal process – even though you’re certainly not alone in the journey. Sending you all the love and good vibes 🙂
~Brittany

By: Carolyn

Carolyn — Thu, 01 Sep 2022 02:37:48 +0000

Thank you for this, which so perfectly articulated this time in my own life…we aren’t not trying, but don’t worry it’s not “sad” yet…but it sort of is? For some reason this topic had rendered me inarticulate and I was able to share this with my husband to help explain how strange and exciting and sad and all the other things, this process is. ❤️

By: Brittany

Brittany — Mon, 22 Aug 2022 16:03:17 +0000

In reply to Land. Thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment! It gives me so much comfort to hear other people's stories. Appreciate your advice!

By: Land

Land — Sat, 20 Aug 2022 16:47:38 +0000

I’ve been there for two years. Then I was 35 and knew it’s now or never. Truly cheap ovulation strips or a more expensive two hormone ovulation monitor (I did both at the same time) is a way to go for those who definitively want to have a baby. Life gets in the way, work, social life, hobbies, travel and it’s more difficult to conceive spontaneously. At least with a monitor or strips you can be more mindful and make choices, and after a year you can decide whether or not you want to seek any testing or treatment. Of course you don’t have do any of that. My comment is in the response to you mentioning feeling shame as well as feeling so in tune with your body as if you expected to be pregnant. To me it sounds you do want a baby but you don’t want to feel the pressure. If that’s the case don’t worry about your weight but get the ovulation strips. Every 6 months reevaluate if you need to make any changes in diet, weight, exercise, medication etc.. If you haven’t decided about having kids and prefer a surprise then don’t do anything at all. It’s somewhat difficult to gauge the goal, but I think the goal should define the actions. You can’t always get everywhere by luck only.

By: Brittany Chaffee

Brittany Chaffee — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 15:51:10 +0000

In reply to Kailey. Kailey, thank you! I FEEL THIS. Passively approaching something that's so life changing and affects our body...how could we?! Wishing you peace and understanding as well. We certainly aren't alone!

By: Brittany Chaffee

Brittany Chaffee — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 15:50:22 +0000

In reply to Ashley. Ashley, thank you so much for reading! Hearing from women like you have made me feel less alone. That's the most powerful thing :)

By: Brittany Chaffee

Brittany Chaffee — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 15:48:56 +0000

In reply to M B.

You’ve made my whole month with this! Thank you so much. I’m so appreciative that you’ve read these words and found peace and understanding. When I’m most scared to write things, I know women are going to find the most truth in the words. We go through so many things that are private and hidden – so it’s so helpful to know that we aren’t alone. It’s been SO TOUGH to feel out of control of something that is such an enormous life change. But, trying to find peace in the notion that time really is meant to be. And congrats to you on the recent news! Sending all the love your way. xoxo

By: Brittany Chaffee

Brittany Chaffee — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 15:45:56 +0000

In reply to M A. Hi, there! This truly means a lot to me to read. I was really nervous to write this piece but knew the women in the W&D community would come forward in a virtual hug. We are certainly not alone in this journey. Thank you, thank you.

By: Kailey

Kailey — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 14:00:24 +0000

This was beautiful. I found the “trying to get pregnant” stage to be littered with questions and anxiety and nerves, no matter how passively we approached it. It turns out, I’m not good at passively approaching anything. Peace in my life looks like a plan of action.
I am wishing you some semblance of peace in the midst of the mess!

By: Ashley

Ashley — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 13:17:33 +0000

Thank you so much for writing this. I legit feel less alone and so much more understood. It feels like everyone around me is pregnant or on kid number 4

By: M B

M B — Tue, 16 Aug 2022 20:41:51 +0000

Brittany, Brittany, Brittany — Girl…can you write! The topics you dissect are beyond brilliant and filled with so much reality and truth. I never comment on stories, yet I’ve commented on several of yours. This article was painfully beautiful. I know what it’s like to be in the space you’re currently in — it’s a space that feels like society doesn’t hold space for because around parenthood and particularly motherhood, there are so many other issues that seem much more deserving of complaint or sadness (such as fertility issues). I held this space for years (I wasn’t exactly in the trying/not trying phase physically the entire time — but mentally I lived in that space — of wanting or not wanting but even knowing deep down that it was more towards wanting than not) Be gentle with yourself and know (as cliche as it always sounds) that timing is everything in the sense that things happen when they should, I truly believe that. But the in between is an odd space and can be very lonely. But thanks to people like you, writing and talking about these topics allow space for people in similar situations. I’m writing this as I am happily and blissfully pregnant…but I will never forget how that time period in my life felt. It’s very real. Best of luck on your journey and be kind to yourself – and drink that cocktail and eat the extra dessert. You deserve it.

By: M A

M A — Tue, 16 Aug 2022 17:41:28 +0000

This! I’m in the exact same stage and feel every single word of this piece. It is a strange space/time to occupy, and I’m almost feeling gaslit by my body each month.

Wishing you the best on this journey.